I have a huge problem with all of these products which (if tele ads are anything to go by) everyone else in the world is using.
Now don’t get me wrong-I’m as fond of a bit of nose caviar as the next -but those synthetic things just don’t work for me.
I blame the Bowling Alley in Cork in the sixties.

To our great excitement Cork opened a bowling alley the mid sixties when I was about sixteen.
I promptly started to haunt the place.
Now one of the great traditions of bowling alleys, I have never worked out whether this is a ploy for extra income or a genuine concern for their floors, that one should rent their special shoes before playing the game.
This sounds fine but the standard of hygiene in Cork in the sixties was such that having gone through lots of Cork feet the shoes started to smell fairly rank.
The bowling alley faced resolutely up to this problem by spraying the shoes with various room freshener sprays in between rental periods.
Now I am certain that these products contain some sort of nasal fixative which insures that the smell hangs about a bit, I mean the evanescent odour of a violet wasn’t going to quench serious Cork foot odour.
Now my theory is that this fixative (I know from my Shakespeare that in his time they used to use the musk glands of the civet cat for this) has a tendency to blend with the odour produced by Cork feet and then produce a new and penetrating evil odour all of its own.
But we were hardy people in Cork in the sixties, and we kept at the bowling for several years.

The problem is that, being conditioned by this smell over that time has now fixed it firmly in my nose and now whenever I get odours of “Room Fresheners” I inevitably smell the background of serious Cork Foot Odour.

Therefore I don’t use the things, but I have discovered another fix for my nose caviar.
I can use scented flowers from our own garden.

Here are some of the current crop, Rose, Carnations and Lavender.
They smell marvellous, not a hint of feet.