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Le Prise de Sang

July 26, 2013
15:19 PM

This morning I went for a blood test at 7.45- in fact I first attempted to give the stuff away yesterday at 11.30. I arrived into the lab to find they had changed the system and when I queued up as usual Madame snapped at me to take a number and wait in the area until I was called. (I was the only one there)

Eventually she called me; “Numero Neuf S’il vous plait?” and I dutifully handed in my ordinance, my mutuel and my Carte Vital. “You have been fasting since midnight ?” “No” I said dismayed, “Nobody told me” “But it is on your ordinance ” she said examining it. then; “No it is not” so then I got my first smile. “It is not your fault ” she said “The doctor should have told you, come back tomorrow at 7.45”

So I did, and this time I took a number and waited to be called.(the waiting room was full at this time) Eventually Madame called me, big smile and wagged a finger at me as she said “This time you havn’t eaten?” ” Not a thing” I said timidly.
She then shot a question at me that I had not been expecting. “Date of birth ?”

Suddenly my brain cleared of all French numbers and I looked at her blankly. I started to mentally count in French – un, deux, trois, but damn me if I could get past douxe- twelve.
The room got quieter as everyone watched my extreme discomfort as I counted inside my now empty head.
Suddenly it came to me !
Treize ! I shouted Treize! Treize Mars.

The whole room heaved a collective sigh. Madame quickly said “1949- it is written here”- To stop me going off into another mind wrencher.

By the time I actually got to give the blood to the nurse I had calmed down a little and was able to laugh feebly when she told me as she removed the eighth vial from my arm “Its all right I will leave you a liddle.”

Comments

  1. Terry Cunningham

    on August 4, 2013

    A good story Martin. I tried to give blood in Waterford after I retired. They were very apologetic but couldn’t take it as I was over 65. I reminded them that my blood wasn’t over 65 and assured them that I had never ever fainted and that I didn’t like Guinness anyway, but no good. They were really really sorry and gave me two Pelican House pencils and a key ring as a consolation. I was unconsolled knowing that I was full of rejected blood. Would they take it in France, I wonder?

  2. Martin Dwyer

    on August 4, 2013

    No Terry, all non-French blood is rejected.
    So much for Egalitie et Fraternitie !

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