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The Post-Mistress

June 30, 2015
18:09 PM

My sister D’s first husband came from Kanturk and her father-in –law, Gus Kelleher, was probably the best man I have ever heard to tell a story.
Two of his best concerned the post-mistress in Kanturk and her dealings with a particularly fertile inhabitant.

This woman arrived into the post-office one day to collect her children’s allowance.
She also informed the post-mistress as she had recently had a new baby she wanted the allowance adjusted accordingly.
Post-Mistress:
“And how can you be having a new child and it well known that your husband is abroad in England for the past eighteen months?”
Mother (cringingly):
“Ah sure Mam, he writes to me”
Post-Mistress (as she stamps the new form):
“Well Jaysus Mam, but he must have a very long pincil”

The second story concerns the revenge of the Mother to the same post-mistress.

She arrives into the post-office, again to collect the children’s allowance, and again requests a change for a new addition.
Post-Mistress:
“Well that’s a great gold-mine you have got there”
Mother (triumphantly)
“Indeed and you have the same gold-mine yourself Mam if only you’d work it!”

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